Sassyness and Nonsense on a Tuesday

I was lonely at work this morning, not a customer in sight and the sun barely grazing the horizon, when I remembered I had a blog! I made a resolution to myself to write in it as soon as I got home. It's 6:08 p.m. and the day is finally slowing to a halt. Here I sit.

I've been supremely loopy all day. My thoughts racing, my mind inconstant, and my emotions piling up and spilling over in waves. I tried to figure out why when I realized I have not eaten today. This is a dangerous game for me since I have hypoglycemia and not eating is a waiting game for when I'll either throw up or pass out. However, today was the first day in a long time that I felt well enough, I'm recovering from a cold, to drink my beloved coffee instead of tea. So, I downed it this morning like a heroin addict returning to the needle. I did not even put soy milk in it which I am apt to do at times, instead I gulped the blackness down, scalding my tongue and throat, not giving a damn.

I'm ODing on caffeine, but I am happy with that. It was in my poetry class that I realized my thoughts are far more abstract than usual. I had a GREAT idea for writing in my journal tonight. I finished my last journal on Saturday night and have been blocked to start my new one. I did not want to start the composition book with simple entries. I wanted a new leaf of writing, renewed inspiration as I've been drained from my efforts during National Novel Writing Month. I feel like an Indian squaw on a fasting vision quest, my coffee is my peyote, the Velvet Underground my spiritual guide. Jeepers, how overdramatic. But, nonetheless I never want to eat again, or at least not until my thoughts can fully flow through my pen and onto paper. I feel like everything around me is begging to be a poem, and pleading to be a metaphor.

"This shaking keeps me steady. I should know."
-Roethke.

I've been repeating that poem to myself every morning for the past two weeks. I adore it.